A Little Christian Humour

Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on
the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was
tired of hearing all the bickering.

Finally fed up, God said, 'THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set
up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will
judge who does the better job.'

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.

They moused.

They faxed.

They e-mailed.

They e-mailed with attachments.

They downloaded..

They did spreadsheets!

They wrote reports.

They created labels and cards..

They created charts and graphs...

They did some genealogy reports .

They did every job known to man.

Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.

Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed
across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power
went off..

Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in
the underworld.

Jesus just sighed..

Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their
computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:

'It's gone! It's all GONE! 'I lost everything when the power went out!'

Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the
past two hours of work.

Satan observed this and became irate.  'Wait!' he screamed. 'That's not
fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don't have any?'
God just shrugged and said,

JESUS SAVES.....

rwar~

posting just to post....

sup'

nothing, just posting~

The preacher and his son.

An old country preacher.....had a teenage son, and it was getting time the
boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. Like many young men
his age, the boy didn't really seem to know what he wanted to do, and he
didn't seem too concerned about it.
One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an
experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four
objects.

1. A Bible...

2. A silver dollar...

3. A bottle of whiskey...

4. And a Playboy magazine...

'I'll just hide behind the door,' the old preacher said
To himself. 'When he comes home from school today,
I'll see which object he picks up.

If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me,
And what a Blessing that would be!

If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a business
Man, and that would be okay, too.

But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good
Drunken bum, and Lord, what a shame that would be.

And worst of all if he picks up that magazine he's going
To be a Skirt-chasing womanizer.'

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's
Footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed
For his room.

The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned
To leave the room, he spotted the objects on the table..

With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. Finally, he
picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm.
He picked up the silver dollar and dropped into his pocket.
He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink, while he
Admired this month's centerfold.


'Lord have mercy,' the old preacher disgustedly whispered.


'He's gonna run for Congress.'

Fear...it is something vital to us puny creatures. The instant man stops fearing is the instant where the species reaches a dead end, only to sink to pitiable lows, only to sit and wait apathetically for extinction!
Humans who lose the ability to think become creatures whose existence has no value. Wake up! Don't be afraid of knowledge! Think, you humans who are split into two worlds! Unless you want the gulf between humans to expand into oblivion, you must THINK!


___________________________________________________________

Don't be absurd! No such attempt has, or ever will be made by any man who so much as understands the word!
For a thing to be called "epic," it must be enduring! It must withstand the ravages of time, bowing not to the wind or the rain or the motion of the very earth! To be epic is to be immortal! Those words and deeds which endlessly live on in the minds of man, whether through fear or admiration.
Therefore to be epic in one's own life is impossible, yet it is for that that we must strive!

I'm creepy?

I was banned from the questionable content because I'm creepy.... apparently.


So if any one that ever reads this also goes there and is a member, please ask that be unbanned.